There's a saying in Chinese saying that,"If you feel the environment around you is not right, then it's you who's not right"...something like that.
True. Now that I know I m not right and I have to fix it.

----------------------------------

I can see that this year's Chinese New Year would be the worst of all. Everyting seems to move so slow and dull. In fact, everyone look so down and sad with loadsa bad stuff coming their way. I hope things gets better for everyone. I really do.

The joy of celebrating is no longer there. My friend is having a bad time with everyone, my another friend is cramping and burning her brain rushing for assignments, my another friend is screaming her lungs out because everyting seems do go the wrong way.

And why am I still here? I m supposed to be on an airplane flying to Manila now. But I didn't board the plane. I don't feel right with the place and everything. So I wasted a two way ticket. Wasted.

And now the gym is indeed my second home. Despite of the muscle pain and abdominal pain, I m happy. The moment I step in there, problems are gone.

Sometimes of course there're some annoying people in your life. You will just wish to say this to them,"I rather go to the gym than to see your face". That would be really good.

I don't wanna write any sad post anymore. I hope to put an end to these. No sad post means a happier me. Sometimes I blame the hormones because they made me feel emotional but it's not the hormones. It's the hormones of other people.

Let's see how things goes. People say life is like a tyre, sometimes you're up, sometimes you're down. Like how a tyre moves. I wanted to tell them that I m always down. Is it because my tyre had a puncture and that I haven't pump any air to it so that it can moves normally? Or because my life is not a tyre but a square slice of bread?...no matter how you move it it will drop down?

Let's see 2007, what you have in store for me?

- a deduction of nearly RM1.5 K from my deserved pay. Someone sliced it because he can't afford to pay me. And that slice will be gone forever.

- a conflict with my friend. A small matter turned big. And of course like always I m the bad one, the wrong one, the stupid one, the magnificent idiot. Don't try to make other people happy when it's them who determine their happiness.

- a lost package from Ebay. Will be gone forever aswell.

- I mentioned before I bought 6 pairs of shoes. It's nearly gone now. Why? My aunt came and saw my shoes and said it's nice and "took it away". My mother and sisters = 3 pairs of shoes. So now left 2. And those 2 I don't wear it everyday. Maybe once a month or so.

I do not hope to add the list longer. I m just having yet another day filled with misery. I need to breathe and breathe.