My new occupation: Pornstar

I do amateur sex, kinky, whatever you name it. I m also a lesbian, a shemale...WTF?

also not forgetting "adultnude hoto bangla famous en toples sex"

I m a pornstar. Yes, by that I mean my name is a porn star's name. Hence, I m a pornstar.

LOL!!! Can that miss porn star that shares my name change her name into another name? I can't stop laughing.

--------------------------------------------------------

Yes, I m addicted to Facebook. Shoot me!

I m also addicted to the internet particularly today because I got a paper tomorrow morning and I can't seem to focus. I need someone in my life who can tell me what to do and take charge of my life. I m hopeless again...

I've never search my name on the internet. Amazing people out there sharing my name. It's fun, go and search yours today and see if you share the same job like I do. LOL! Let's do porn together gether okay?

A trip to the doctor

Doctor: Have a seat here, please. What's your problem?
Me: Actually...I don't know what's my problem... -_-!!!
Doctor: Haha...You don't know what's your problem and you're here? Haha!
Me: Haha. Yeah, because I've never encounter this before. First I had diarrhea and then I started to lose weight although I ate 4 times more than usual and then I felt dizzy, before sleep and when waking up. That's why I don't know what's my problem.
Doctor: Okay...when did this happenned?
Me: I think since my Great Diarrhea a few weeks back. Got it since my visit to Indonesia.
Doctor: Owh...The Great Diarrhea. Haha. Okay...Do you eat healthy food or...wait, you said you got that since the trip to Indonesia, rite? I think it's food poisoning. How long has the dizziness been going on?
Me: A few days back. I think 3 days back. I think I m lack of sleep.
Doctor: Yeah, true, lack of sleep will also cause dizziness.
Me: Yeah...you see the finals is very near, in fact this week. [I didn't tell him I went out nearly every night, so he thinks I m studying till late]
Doctor: *taking blood pressure*Ahhh...finals eh...I see. Your blood pressure is normal. Nothing wrong with that. ...You have to sleep more. How many hours did you sleep normally?
Me: Erm....not sure...I sleep at 4 am and wake up at 9 am. And sometimes I can't even sleep at 4. It's very uncertain.
Doctor: *Shakes head*... Make you go to bed at 10 tonight. You have to sleep normally. About your weight lost, do you get bloated after every meal?
Me: Yeah, very bloated but everything comes out after that. Very fast. I don't think my weight lost is a problem, my dizziness is the thing I m afraid of most. I lost 2 kgs last week.
Doctor: 2 kgs per week is a big problem. Worse than your dizziness. You have a big hidden problem you know. Tell you what, I will give you carbon, you know...charcoal to get rid of the wind and you get this Lacto-5 from the pharmacy okay. You know Lactobasilus?
Me: Heard of it but I can't remember.
Doctor: You know Vitagen? Yakult?
Me: Oh yah...yah. So I have to drink that?
Doctor: I m not sure if they really contain Lactobasilus but you try that for a week first, 2 bottles a day and then if the symptom doesn't dissapear, you get that Lacto-5 from the pharmacy okay. If everything doesn't work, come back here and we'll find a way to solve this okay.
Me: Okay...charcoal and Yakult...okay thanks. [Charcoal!!! You know those black colour thingy that people use to burn? Weird names]

And that costs me RM20. Having fever is much more expensive than an unknown problem anyway. Haha. I m going a bit crazy now. Drank too much Yakult. Not my favourite drink but it's good for the stomach.

Finals is coming and no one volunteered to slap me. Anyway, I turn myself into a good girl already. I started to search for my notes and books. At least that's a good start.

Slap me

Somebody please do me a favour. Please slap me on my face and wake me up. I won't kill your dog by doing so.

3 weeks of semester break really spoils me. And I still havent study yet for my finals. I m getting old with poor memory... I think. Things don't go in my brain as fast as it used to be. And the best part is I didn't really work becoz I need a break from working. Although I m a workaholic, I need a break sometimes. So I m incomeless and brainless.

I lose some weight again. I ate 4 times more and yet I m losing weight. People say I should be happy but I felt weak. Besides eating, I m glued to the telly. I have become a weight-losing couch potato. Still no mood to study.

Please slap me again and wake me up. Please...

Girly Man

Had a bad day?

Take a look at this. LOL!!!

Friends

Friends...are unpredictable

I don't know what to say anymore but I will still go on with my plans.

Borrrrrrrrrrrrrred

Since my semester break (it's my study week actually), instead of studying, I:

- killed some ants, poke some bubbles, killed some imaginary soldiers, smacked some weird creatures, made a rabbit hop higher nearly everyday on my laptop. I m talking about online games. Jeez...I m addicted to games.

- sleep at 4am and wake up at 9am, everyday and sleep again somewhere in the afternoon. Hopeless

- spent my time on Facebook, Friendster, Multiply, Zorpia and all sorts of websites where my friends are. Updating myself of their whereabouts.

- Took tonnes of photos with my camera. I snapped nearly every single object available in this house including the furnitures. Sick.

- am too lazy to work, I felt like puking even when I m reading work-related emails.

- still havent pack my luggage, I have no idea about the weather except it's gonna be damn cold. Havent book any accomodation yet. How smart!

- am BORED!!! Help!

Camera sick

Well...well:

- 4 people thought I m already in Germany (because of some rumours)

- I bought a camera...yaay!!! A new Nikon P5100 which is much more cheaper than a G9 for RM1340 for a 2Gb SD card, pouch, tripod, 2 customized photo album, 120pcs of photos (applicable when you processed your photos), umbrella, bag...etc etc..and I added RM90 for a 4Gb SD card upgrade. What a steal!

- I didn't buy any DSLR for the time being because I got an offer to become an event photographer for concerts and big events. If they really want me, I would get a high end DSLR instead. I would get a D300 instead of a D80 or any Canon Rebel XT. That's the reason why I got that P5100 in the first place. To replace my old faithful camera while waiting for this job confirmation. And I will be spending more on lenses and photography stuff. Is this a good offer? Btw, it's still the same company, just that I have more work to do. Freelance. Period.

- My friend told me this,"Everybody loves you". He's not the first one who said that to me. My lecturer, grandmother, sisters, aunts, uncles said that before. Why did I felt there's someting wrong with that phrase?

- For nearly 5 months, I m socially impared. I thought I lost my friends, I thought I m already an island in the making but that's not true. I have friends. Yes, I still have them in my pocket, some worried sick about me, some wonder where I had been. Yaay...I m not that anti-social after all. It's just a social setback, you know, like financial setback, I got a social setback due to unavoidable reaons.

- I have to avoid any shops selling cameras and lenses wherever I go. I ended up buying my new camera in a span of 3 hours. 2 and a half hours looking for DSLR because they're out of stock. Damn why is D80 so sellable? Besides their lame excuses like, "out of stock", "don't have lah", "hafta wait 3-5 months lah", "sorry lah". And that half an hour of looking at the specs for Nikon P5100. And I got it. That was fast.

- I have 8 finals' paper. And I still havent start any revision yet.

::
- I think I m getting better in handling workplace conflict. It happens. Broke my heart into pieces several times but I handled it well yesterday. No one got killed.

Very much awake

Why am I still awake?
I m not sleepy at all. I went clubbing with my friends, god knows how many clubs we went into. First it was Maison, there are having some sorta traffic light night. Where you choose either red, yellow or green. Singles wear green. So all three of us went in with green band but there's no crowd. Boring. So we went to Cynna. No crowd as well. Boring. Then we decided to change location to Sultan Ismail. Went in Aloha. Sucks big time. I've never been into a club that sucky that conned our money. Fuck that. Then there's this horny chinese guy. Fuck him. He's been staring at me since the dawn of civilization. I didn't know until he come nearer and nearer to me, grab my waist and I started to talk to me. I was like, "Hello!!! What do you want?" Then he followed me the whole night. I asked him to backed off...he did for a while. Jeez...I felt so damn irritated. But he's near me again and agan and again with his horny eyes. So damn irritating.

And then came a bunch of germans, one very old one. And a few around mid 30s. My friends were talking to them and that same chinese guy came to me again and grab my waist (again!). I went in between the germans. He came to me again and then he asked,"You like white people huh?" I just ignore him and hide behind some people. It seems like I was too big size, I have to stand behind another younger german to hide myself from that guy. No long after that, I saw him again. He came to me again. I was pissed. I've been so stressed out, I just wanna have some fun, chilling out with my friends since it's the last day of the semester, but this irritating guy came following me wherever I go. Holy shit! He even spilled our drinks without apologizing. What a LOSER.

Back to my friend. That old german was so interested into her. Haha. I couldn't stop laughing. He wouldn't wanna let her go. Not even for a second. Then I was avoiding that same chinese guy, I hide behind another guy. Then he introduced himself as Juergen. Wahahaha...is that my blog friend Juergen? I was wondering. I wanted to ask more but that old german wanted to bring my friend home, so we have to help her. She got panicked. We ignored everyone and ran away. What a night!

Then we went in to Thai Club. Becoz we know some people there, we're like VIPs. Free flow of drinks. I can't drink because I have to drive. What a pity. But at least we did enjoy ourselves minus that horny chinese guy. Eukkkssss...Maybe I look "easy" to him. Jeezzzzzzzzz...my nightmare. So now it's offical I havent sleep for nearly 24 hours. Yesterday I was busy finishng my assignment. Broke another record. The quickest assignment I've ever done. It took me 4 hours to finish everything.

My plan is to party every night till my finals. I felt I've been locked up in a cage for this semester. I need a break. I was invited to stay at any of my relatives' house in Thailand for the holidays but I still have no plans in my mind yet. I really wanna go but I have some responsibilities here. Aih...decisions decisions. And I still haven't plan my Germany trip yet. So many things to be done. Not to forget to study for my final exam. Eukkkssss...

Think Thank Thunk

I m out of words.

Last semester I was her best student in class scoring strings of A's.

This semester I am no doubt a piece of shit. No hope for any A's at all since I screwed up my mid-term papers. I can't blame it on anyone or anything. I was emotionally unstable for that week. My dad had an eye operation, I was still arguing with him during that period, I had to leave for Indonesia that very same day with 6 exam papers sandwiched in between, with 13 people from other countries to be taken care of for the whole 4 days because of language barriers between those countries and Indonesian language.

I wished that I was 10,000 times emotionally stronger. I can't believe that I scored 17/40 for my German Literature. I can't tell the difference between Boccaccio and Lessing's Ringparabel, I can't describe the French Revolution, I can't even explain about main ideas during the Classical-period. I wrote the test without any preparation. That's only one of my six papers. I've got 9 altogether.

Assessment is my worst nightmare. I fear to fail. I wished I could just memorize all the facts like my friends. The only thing I could ever remember would be ABCs and the times table. Why am I pressuring myself?

No one ever asked about my PMR, SPM or STPM results since I left school. Let's say I m a 2.0 student. What will happened? Will I be labelled as stupid? What if I m really that stupid? No one will blame me right? Maybe I m genetically stupid. Maybe I will be labelled as lazy. Maybe both. If I m stupid, there're stupider people around me right? Yeah, I m stupid. So what? I bet some smart people can't even bite their toes like me. I m so unbelievably stupid that I turned down so many offers that were offered to me. Or maybe stupid people get more offers because smart people can manage to get them with their brains?

6 more months till freedom. 6 is the number. Patience is all I need.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

I m going to celebrate my birthday tomorrow with the other October babies. That means I will be 22 a few days earlier. Hehe. Nooooo...I m old!!! 22. What a number. My mum gave birth to me when she was 22. That was during her time. A mother at the age of 22. How young was that? It's like having a friend my age with a baby. Scary or lovely?

I lost 3 kgs, no thanks to the diarrhea that lasted for nearly a week. And we're going to have Japanese Buffet tomorrow to put back what the toilet bowl took from my body.

I felt so much better after telling the whole world that I'm stupid. Ahhhh...what a relief. No one will look high on me to do things for them. Cheers!

Comparison

5 months ago...

- I had better skin
- I was mentally healthy
- I was more motivated to do things
- I don't have any stiff shoulders
- I don't have any intention to kill anyone
- I don't have any white/gray hair
- Ideas came to me like lighting
- I was a human vacumn-cleaner for food without having any stomach problems
- I was a bit normal
- I had better memory

Now...
- All the above mentioned in contrast.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

The toilet bowl is now my second sofa. My stomach is killng me. It has been like that since I got back from Indonesia. In fact, my sister is having the same syndrome. Owh...the toilet is calling me again...

7 things I didn't know about myself until last Saturday

1) I got a few strands of white hair hiding beneath my dark brown hair (I've been thinking and stressing too much. It's sad news for me. I m not even 22 yet but I have white hair growing without my permission)

2) I always left my clothes behind in several places wherever I go

3) Everyone in my extended family still thinks that I m a baby. They forgot that I will grow up one day and become a 22 year old like now. My grandaunt said,"You will be forever a baby in our eyes no matter how old you've grown."

4) I have a crazy uncle who lives in Phuket. He claimed that he's an idiot and pretended to be a retard whenever I talk to him. Did I mentioned that he's 47 years old?

5) I m stupid when it comes to accepting gifts from people. I always say "No". For the 5th time, I refused to accept a brand new car as a present from them.

6) I didn't know that I 35 percent Thai. I always thought that I m only 25 percent Thai.

7) Shopping is not my favourite activity. I got mall-sickness when I was in Indonesia. I visited 8 shopping malls in 4 days and I came back with 2 dictionaries. I am such a Geek!