Dream a dream...

Let's talk about dreams today...(not wet dreams but) real terrifying dreams.

This always happens to me, whenever I m sick, I always dream of falling down from a bridge or being stuck in a chess set. Some things will just come and chase me out of no where. That's when I m sick. And also sometimes when I woke up, I sweat more than a pig, and I wish I never had slept at that moment.

Some years back I had a dream of me dying. An "angel" out of no where told me this: "You're dying today at 5.35pm". Be prepared. Bid goodbye to ur family and friends". And what I replied was,"Orrr...ok". Man, someone told me that I'm gonna die and what I replied was "OK"? That's so freaking weird. Maybe that time I m really really down and I don't have the will to go on. Maybe. But I couldn't believe my answer. They even prepared the whole dying ceremony thing for me. I saw people crying. It do hurts to leave them forever. It's a very terrifying experiance. When I woke up, I felt like kissing and hugging everyone. I started to appreciate life more than never.

Then 2 years ago, for 3 consecutive months I kept having this dream about people dying. Corpes were being carried everywhere. People always die in front of me. It's either me or someone. Jeez. I don't know what's wrong with my brain, it's like a computer virus or I hadn't clean-up my memory for a while. I m terrified. I felt the loneliness, the cold feeling, the weirdness of being the only one alive. It's not a pleasant feeling. I don't like it at all. This thing is more horrifying than horror movies. I feel the "pain". I wonder what behind all these.

Being naked is another thing. I've dreamt of me being naked before an appointment or at school. I know I must put on someting but some kinda force or procrastination stoped me. I felt scared. Insecurity loams me. Perhaps I did someting not right but the thing is, it's not right to let me have a dream of being naked in front of everybody. It's scary. Even till now.

Then, I used to have this dream of losing all my teeth when I was 8 or 9, the time when you have ur tooth pulled out and stuff like that. And then losing my hair, which is like when you comb ur hair, all ur hair fall down like how rain falls, I think I've lost too many erasers and pencils that time, I got "punished" in my dreams. So from that day onwards, I keep my pencils and erasers properly. What a dream to make me a better person.

Then on and on, I will have dreams that make me cry, don't know for what reason, but I cried. When I woke up, my pillow will be soaking wet with my tears (and not saliva) and I don't know why I cried. When I woke up, I felt restless and very very tired but I have no idea where those tears came from. It's supposing to be a sad thing, but I think it's more like having a very big anger on somebody but you can't do anything to improve the situation. I felt damn useless. But till now, I still have no idea what's that about.

People says that dreams interprete a meaning. I m doing some research on it. It do scares me a LOT. Is it because I can't let go of something or because of other things? I need to see a dream interpreter. Anyone?