"I nearly stab my roommate this morning for no reason..."

"I m so stress lately I can't think straight"

"I felt like killing myself everyday"

"I think I m going nuts..."

"I felt like jumping off from any building in KL"

Those were the things my coursemates said to me this afternoon. Everyone's having their very-emotional-nearing-the-end-of-semester-stress. I understand. I have them like everyday but I m not bothered now because I got no time to bother about those things. I just can't be bothered.

3-4 hours of sleep a day doesn't help me at all. Sometimes I felt like hiring someone to do my work for 300 bucks a day so that I can get a good sleep. I don't dream about dead people anymore (that's the good news) but now I often dream about going to classes, sitting inside the class, answering question inside the class, talking to lecturers in my dream. For god's sake...I study in my dream aswell. Does that mean that I will graduate with 2 degrees at the same time? One in reality and one in Dreamland? That's really really terrible. At least when I dream of dead people I m just scared for that moment but not the rest of the day (when I woke up), but exams and studies do haunt me aswell during the day.

Relax!!!
Everyone been saying that 5-letter word to me. The personal trainer, the dentist, the karate trainer, the lecturer, my family members...because they said I can't relax and always look very stressed out. I didn't realised that because I m already very relax during their sessions/ while meeting them. Just imagine when I m really really stressed out like these few days. I felt like bitting everyone like a mad dog but I couldn't do so because it's damn blardy INSANE. Instead of bitting people, I've been bitting on food and you know what that means...food=FAT.
I really couldn't help bitting things. I don't have the habit of bitting my nails. It's just between human and food. Luckily I chose food over human. I don't wanna kill anyone although sometimes I felt like pulling the trigger if I have a M-16 gun. Arghhhh...frustfrating.

I can't deny the fact that I have luck in meeting strange people hence my weirdness. Normal people find me weird (maybe because I got weird taste, weird background???). Strange people find me normal because they are strange and abnormal. So that sum up my month of August. It's a month of meeting strangers giving me strange comments like:

- I've never heard of granddaughter driving grandmother's car story. You're the first. [some woman told me this]

- (out of nowhere) Your Mandarin is very bad, did you know that. You got a very heavy Cantonese accent!!! [that bitch said this to me in front of her friends. What do you expect from someone who only got to learn Mandarin just a few years back. I m Chinese illiterate and I speak only Cantonese at home. I m sure her English and Malay sucks like mad. Duh!]

- You looked like my friend. That's why I love to look at you. Reallllly!!! I love to look at you. [some girl told me this. Sounds creepy eh. I doubt if she's straight. That really freaks me out totalllly.]

Whatever it is I just flash a BIG SMILE and go on with life. I can't help if I m the perfect target for verbally malfunctionised people like that. I should be happy because I always attract attention without having to do anything. I've got people treating me like a small kid at the photocopy shop, people telling me about their laws of men and women out of a sudden, etc etc. I should be happy rite?